Limiting beliefs are negative thoughts that have been repeated so much that they have now become part of your belief system. That is all! All beliefs are just thoughts that you have kept thinking for too long.
Now, some beliefs definitely serve you. You know them because every time you practice that belief, you feel good. But others don’t. These are called limiting beliefs. So, knowing that, isn’t it easy to entertain the idea of choosing new thoughts? Over time, new thoughts replace old beliefs, supporting your vision of your life and who you want to be.
Limiting beliefs appear in all areas of our lives. Maybe they come from something you were told over and over again when you were a child. I hear many examples in my practice as a coach, such as:
“There will always be someone smarter, prettier and better.”
“Money does not grow on trees!”
“I’m just meant to be the beefy girl!”
“Life is hard!”
“I have to work hard to earn a lot of money!”
“I’m just not smart enough!”
“Life is hard!”
“I’ll never meet the right guy!”
“It’s hard.” (Being everything they want to achieve).
“That’s not something I’ll ever be good at.”
“I always find something wrong with the men I date.”
“I know I just have to settle”
“I’ve never been good at (fill in the blank).”
“I know I won’t be happy until… (fill in the blank).”
As you can see, there are too many to list here. So what is yours? In a little while we’ll talk about ways to get in touch with limiting beliefs and how to get rid of them from your life…one at a time!
They usually appear when you are about to try something new, take a risk, or step out of your comfort zone.
However, these limiting beliefs are meant to be challenged! In fact, it is imperative that they are because they will leave you paralyzed.
Think of it this way: you are painting your picture of possibility, or thinking about what you want to create in your life. As you do this, some of those limiting beliefs pop into your head. When that happens, you are interfering with the Universe. It’s like you’re saying, “I want this, but look at this right here!” and, “I really want to achieve this goal look (limiting belief)”.
Now, you are sending mixed signals to the Universe. And most likely you will not manifest what you want. In other words, you manifest more of what you don’t want.
So let’s talk about some processes to clear those beliefs.
1) QUIET. Find a quiet place where you can sit and be alone.
2) ASK. Ask the Universe to show you the limiting beliefs you hold. (Hint: This is easy if you start by thinking about what you want. Then, if they’re there, they’ll most likely start to surface.)
3) WRITE. As limiting beliefs occur to you, write them down.
4) QUESTION. After you have them on paper, question each belief:
– Is this REALLY true?
– What if there was another way to feel that? What would you choose?
– Where does this come from?
– How does this belief support who I really am?
– How has this belief stopped me?
– What do I choose to believe NOW?
5) RELEASE. Burn them! After you have challenged each belief, it is important that you find a symbolic way to let go of the old beliefs. Some people burn them. That’s what I do.
6) REPLACE. Write a new belief. Now that you’ve gotten rid of the old beliefs, it’s time to write a new belief. Review each LIE and replace it with your new TRUTH.
7) AFFIRM. These work best in the form of affirmations. Affirmations are thoughts and wishes written in the present tense. An example might be: “I am so thankful for this day because it brings me joy! I deserve all the good things in my life and I am so happy to have a loving and supportive relationship with my partner!”
Remember that with the Law of Attraction, the Universe cannot differentiate between what is happening in the past, now or in the future. So whenever you are replaying an old bad scenario in your head, the Universe will respond to the thoughts and feelings you are generating and offer you more of those thoughts and feelings, as if it were happening right now. Likewise, putting your affirmation in the future tense will also have a negative effect by always keeping it a little out of reach. So, don’t play someday’s game either. It has to be something you want to create, become, or have in the future, but in the present tense as if it were happening now.
Remember, the most powerful point of attraction is in the NOW. It also has to be believable to you.
I met a girl who wanted to meet her soulmate. But every time she practiced her affirmation, “I am in a loving and intimate relationship with my soulmate,” she aroused feelings of lack. She would focus on the fact that she didn’t have it, or she didn’t know why she didn’t already have it, and she just didn’t feel right about it, period. So since she was saying one thing and she was feeling another, she was not aligned with what she really wanted. And nothing changed.
So the claim has to feel good and believable to you! It must manifest a good feeling when it leaves the mouth or goes to the paper.
8) BE GRATEFUL! The most powerful way to use the Law of Attraction is to be grateful! Why? Because gratitude is the fastest vehicle to change your vibration level! Just find something to be thankful for that will help you get into the right frame of mind, like:
“I’m so happy now that I am.”
“I’m so thankful I did”
“I join the fact that”
“I am so grateful to be in the process of”
“I’m so happy now that I choose”
If you feel any tension speaking your affirmations out loud or writing them down, you can add:
“…And I release myself from any need to feel like I don’t deserve this”
“…And I release any need to hold on to past beliefs”
“…And I release the need to feel sad, depressed, or any other negative emotion that keeps me out of alignment with what I really want.”
I think you will find this exercise very useful. Remember: you may have to do this exercise again every time a new desire comes into your life and you wonder why it hasn’t manifested yet. You see, the Universe always answers you, every time. So if you are not receiving, it is only because you are not allowing it. And the only way to stop it is by noticing how you are vibrating or thinking and feeling what it is that you want.
I suggest setting aside 15 minutes a day to visit your intentions and affirmations. In just 15 minutes a day, you’ll see big changes not only in the way you see the world, but also in how it sees you and what it gives you in response.
For you! Manifesting your dreams and following your happiness! Life is meant to be joyful!
Heidi L Bilonick, PCC Certified Professional Life Coach Practicing the art and science of getting out of your own way!
Copyright Heidi Bilonick January 17, 2007, all rights reserved. You may reprint this article if you do so in its entirety.